Maintaining a healthy and vital relationship is challenging and many people need guidance at some point in their relationship. Although you know that, "marriage/relationships take work," you may not have a clear picture of what this work actually entails. Would you gladly take up a shovel and begin digging a ditch if this would only help your relationship?
Couples therapy can be extremely helpful in defining the work that needs to be done. I have several years of experience helping couples with multiple issues, from the ubiquitous “we just don’t communicate,” to sexual difficulties, healing from infidelity and addressing the impact of untreated addiction or mental health problems. As your couples’ therapist, I will provide a safe container for problematic issues that feel overwhelming for you and your spouse. I see myself as therapist to your relationship, rather than to either of you individually, and I will challenge you and your partner to identify your own contribution to the difficulties between you. We will define treatment goals based upon the vision you and your spouse have for what is possible between you. It is my job to gently, yet firmly, hold the two of you on the path toward reaching these goals. This often means interrupting the cycle of blame that you are engaged in with your spouse and guiding you back to focus upon your own presence in the relationship.
Couples often wait too long to get help for their relationship. People feel that they should be able to “fix” it themselves. The problem with this attitude is that the longer couples wait to get help, the more intractable problems can become. Things can get better, and often rapidly, if problems are addressed with honesty and care. Taking the risk to get help for your relationship will empower you and your partner with information and with tools for change.
